The Fucking Eagles

GAPTOOTH JUKEBOX RECORDS PEDANTIC FUCK-ALL OMMISION STATEMENTS RE: THE FUCKING EAGLES

THE TOTEM IS STRONG
The Fucking Eagles are a fuck + cluck music group of contentious quality with no coherent thrill line. Posing interlopers. Hack-happy chancers. Self-aware maladroits ghost-smithing varied scraps and hooks yoinked from a dusty American R&R narrative to scratch out a shameless howl & dumb wholly steeped in barren third-world city sophisticrap affectations. Formed in 2005 in the arsenic drenched, barren landscapes and history-heavy bar back-rooms of industrial old town Tacoma, Washington and imbibed on shared lifetimes of toxic smelter air and Rosalie ghost stories, the quattro seeks to serve up all that smoky sweet raw-packed haunted-city ware in loud, danceable, junk soul form. Never mind the caustic name and the faux-tough aire, good-timey frug and shug is the totem..rocky, rolly, the cottonpickin' holy - it's all there, cooing with the excellently bedheaded masses to unfold their arms, get on their feet, and fuck out loud right along with. The soul-full-of-it and the soulless, Brill Building tenant discards, and all manner of clunky rhythm'n lose not-so-originals and shoulda-beens/sorta-weres from a mutant cadre of inspirators: Gino Washington, Kitty Love, The Compulsive Gamblers, Ronnie Hawkins, Mickey Lee Lane, Erma Franklin - all now unwilling recipients of an expertless musical mistreatment and stuffed into the mercilessly contrived and ineptly fuckocted Eagles' repeturd.

MASTERBATORY WOOT-WOOT
Heavy debts are owed equally to both that stack of scratchy 45's over there (that you really should put in sleeves), as to the 90's trash punk roots-deconstructionist stylee that groups like the Oblivians and the Compulsive Gamblers set the bar with in the 90's. Their loose punk cross-breeding of 50's pop, 60's raunch soul, and Memphis-style rhythm + blues served as prime inspirator for the Fucklets - a cover of the Gambler’s 'Stop + Think It Over' (Greg 'take over the world' Cartwright penned) is even ventured in the waning minutes of the (Eagles’ new) record, along with roughed-up versions of songs by Gino Washington, Sir Mack Rice, The Everly Brothers, and Chuck Willis.

WHO TO BLAME
To blame here are long standing undignitaries of the Tacomutant citizenry - John was in Seaweed a million years ago. But this is now, and no one is pogo-ing. The Fuckers are also in house, specific identities of which will not be divulged. T-Town lineage and bragging rite affiliations to hometown legends the Sonics are also proudly touted here as Sonics' sax player Rob Lind's niece Kathlyn, who along with husband Wade (who was also in Seaweed), joined the Fuckles on their new record and contributed vocals and organ.

WHITE AND UPTIGHT
Live, the Fucklets are a joyously ragged affair, infectiously wild and seemingly determined to never 'tighten up'. Forceful frug and chug by way of a set of '63 marine pearl shells and a hand me down Silvertone with a broken cone. Doo wop and the doo wrong. The Fucking Eagles want you checking for the dust on the needle, even as you're seeing them live. The band has been privileged to be frequently invited onto bills to join a grand and head-scratchingly varied list of co-conspirators including: The King Khan + BBQ Show, Andre Williams, The Flash Express, Nomeansno, Girl Trouble, The Tough + Lovely, The Invisible Eyes, The Candy Snatchers, The Paper Dolls, Pure Country Gold, The Silverkings, Iceage Cobra, The Slip-Its, Thee Headliners, The Earaches, The Snakebites, The Whore Moans, The Dt's, The Ruby Doe, The Hot Rollers, The Hands, The Hacks, Seaweed, The Boss Martians, Das Llamas, The Ruby Doe, and most recently as sole support act for Har Mar Superstar at a sold-out 1200 capacity show at the Showbox in Seattle.

A MILLION DOLLARS WORTH OF MUSIC
Last summer the Eagles flew north to the big shitty to record their eponymous debut, 'A Million Dollars Worth Of Music'. A rousing round of hits + tits produced by Johnny Sangster (Mudhoney, Young Fresh Fellows, Makers) at Chroma Sound Studios with which the group sought to go beyond the classic garage drunk stylee and stretch their earlier trash rock cues. Sangster's clean production sensibility provided for a more immediate recording that didn't hide the group in lo-fi, and gave warm clarity to the rhythm'n soul totems employed therein. Piano driven pounders, roller-rink organ swells, dueling tambourine tracks and party-time shouts and womps provide for the party kicks and right up front are all the ham-handed flirtations with melody, backyard gospel, and country rock strains of the materials' half covers/half originals make-up. What’s left is a well mannered investigation of connections between motor city get down, girl group songwriting pathos, Robitussin'd Midwestern rural twang blat, northwest stomp, and riverboat shitty gritty. The results of which show clear lines of descent for the 45 worshipping set, while also highly accessible to the party rock-going can't dance masses.
OFFICIAL ALBUM RELEASE DATE: APRIL 13th, 2007 on Gaptooth Jukebox Records

FUTURE EAGLES
Russell Simmins, drummer of the (Jon Spencer) Blues Explosion, has offered to produce a future something, and a west coast jaunt and new 7 inch single split with The Gold Teeth are being birthed.

PRODUCT OF TACOMA, WA: THIRD WORLD CITY
'Length of Pipe' b/w 'Feel So Bad' single demo - radio airplay on KEXP's Sonic Reducer in Seattle.

'A Million Dollars Worth Of Music' Cd long player - heavy rotation radio airplay on KEXP in Seattle, reaching #8 on the April/May charts and #1 for the Northwest April/May chart, #12 on CiTR’s may chart in Vancouver, BC. Additional play on KNDD 107.7, 104.9 Funky Monkey, WFMU in New Jersey, and various podcasts around the world.

ALL OF CREATION NODS IN APPROVAL
"I Love The Fucking Eagles" The Stranger
"..I love the Fucking Eagles. This is not an endorsement of a twisted Don Henley project, but a recommendation for a new Tacoma band..sounding like a more abrasive and chaotic version of Reigning Sound's garage-soul punk and operating with enough petulant attitude to erase Tacoma's reputation as a musician's wasteland.."
- Hannah Levin, The Stranger

KEXP 90.3 Seattle
"This Tacoma band’s debut album is a sweat-soaked dance party of old school garage-rock injected with high-energy R&B in ways reminiscent of modern-day rockers like the Mooney Suzuki, the Hives and the Oblivians, not to mention a variety of more vintage sources including Mitch Ryder, the Human Beinz and hometown heroes the Sonics. The songs are split evenly between covers and originals, but whether they’re digging up old soul chestnuts from Gino Washington and Sir Mack Rice or tearing into one of their own catchy originals, they bring a feral intensity and unbridled enthusiasm that’s utterly refreshing. "
- Don Yates, KEXP Music Director

"I LOVE THE FUCKING EAGLES!" Weekly Volcano
"I'm in love with the Fucking Eagles..through the magic of Myspace, I tracked down and blasted through the four songs posted, including the endorphin generating 'Length Of Pipe' and 'Feel All Right', a vocal-less shot in the arm that sonically sits your ass down in a musty '60s garage and blows the smell of smoking amplifiers and cigarettes in your face. It's never been truer. I love the Fucking Eagles..half of Seaweed will be at Hell's Kitchen on Friday, and even more exciting, the Fucking Eagles are who everyone will leave talking about."
- Matt Driscoll, Weekly Volcano

"Party Trash" Pure Country Gold
"Get a whiff of Tacoma aroma! The Fucking Eagles (former Seaweed/Ronson Family Switchblade members) - the current rulers of NW party-trash."
- Petey J. Cool, Pure Country Gold (Empty Records)

"Cinco de Mayo and The Fucking Eagles" Weekly Volcano
"As for the music, the razor-edge renderings by The Drug Purse, Paris Spleen, And Those Who Were Dragged, Jeremy Silas, Gold Teeth and Stephen Minor were prrrrfection, but the only thing I have left to say is that The Fucking Eagles are fucking awesome and their joint performance with Beat Box Fred was fucking incredible."
- Carmen Jones, Weekly Volcano